> ## Content Index > Fetch the complete content index at: https://www.dojoactors.com/llms.txt > Use this file to discover other available public pages before exploring further. # Suffering? You're Not Alone (And It's Not the End) - URL: https://www.dojoactors.com/suffering/ - Published: 2022-11-29T02:11:37.000Z - Updated: 2026-08-18T00:35:37.000Z - Author: Tahlia Norrish ****Article precap:** 1️⃣ [Theory](#transparency-central) 2️⃣ [Practice](#the-rulebook) 3️⃣ [TL;DR summary](#tldr) 4️⃣ [References](#%E2%80%8Ccitations) 5️⃣ [Recommended citation](#cite-us) You know what's heartbreaking? The number of actors who come to the Dojo suffering unnecessarily. It's heartbreaking because few are aware that they're experiencing *suffering*, and even fewer are aware they're suffering *unnecessarily*. The most popular flavours of this suffering seem to be [frustration](https://www.dojoactors.com/disillusioned-actor/), [jealousy](https://www.dojoactors.com/investigate-jealousy/), and [despair](https://www.dojoactors.com/desperate-and-successful/). All seem to come drizzled with a sticky sundae sauce of self-criticism along the lines of, "I shouldn't be feeling these emotions / I'm doing something wrong / I'm not cut out for this". It genuinely breaks our heart because if there's any group of actors we most need in this industry, it's Dojo actors. Y'all are some of the most talented, dedicated, courageous, generous, and warm-hearted people out. It's not just that you ninja homies *deserve* to thrive, the long-term health of our industry *depends* on it. Here's how we approach working with actors in this situation. [1-On-1 coaching sessions](https://www.dojoactors.com/1-on-1/) exist, of course, but this might be all you need. ****Backed by science; built for the stage and screen.** 👊 ****Actors:** Get evidence-informed insights and strategies to support your performance and well-being. [Join the Dojo e-newsletter tribe](https://www.dojoactors.com/#/portal/signup) and make thriving your reality. 🧭 ****Drama schools & Production companies:** Bring pioneering, research-backed coaching into your classroom or rehearsal room. [Let's talk](mailto:dojoactors@gmail.com) about supporting your actors to perform at their peak – and stay well in the process. ## Transparency central **PSA** 📢 EVERY ACTOR FEELS FRUSTRATION / JEALOUSY / DESPAIR 📢 The above is in caps lock for a reason. Let it sink in. Yes, we're all special little snowflakes, but human emotions are human emotions, amigo. It's not personal. We're not doing anything wrong. We're also not alone. Anyone we encounter on the actor's path who's no longer suffering unnecessarily has simply face-planted on the realisation below: *Suffering = Pain × Resistance*[\[1\]](#%E2%80%8Ccitations) Pain is a given. It's a part of every career path because it's a part of *life*. Suffering, on the other hand, is optional. If we're suffering, it means we're multiplying our pain by a number that isn't zero. We all remember what \[insert any number\] x 0 equals, right? ## The rulebook We voluntarily signed up to be an actor. Meaning we agreed to the rules of the game: - No one gets to book everything always. - No one gets to work forever without pause. - No one gets the entire stadium cheering for them. What's tricky is that 95% of us never received a rulebook, so we signed up without knowing the full extent of what we were saying yes to. The industry doesn't go out of its way to makethis explicit (it would be bad PR). It's a self-defeating strategy, but it is what it is. Acknowledging this, we now have a couple of choices. We can: 1. Leave and play another game. 2. Complain and rage (i.e., suffer unnecessarily – this referee ain't changing the rulebook for nobody). 3. Accept and *enjoy* the game. If we wish to enjoy the game, accepting the rules is crucial. It means every time we go to dispute (resist) a rule (pain) leading to (unnecessary) suffering, we realise, "Oh, yeah, that's right! This is one of the rules! It applies to LITERALLY EVERY ACTOR who plays". ![Taylor Swift "Shake It Off" gif](https://media.tenor.com/L4bPYvdexlgAAAAC/taylor-swift-shake-it-off.gif) That's called multiplying by 0, friends. And, legit, it completely flips how we experience #actorlife. For most, it takes a good few reps to get to that moment of space and clarity and, ultimately, Taylor Swift-level freedom. But damn, they're reps worth putting in. Especially if we intend to play the actor's game for some time. After some time, we may feel ready to step it up and start playing with the MVPs. That is, *sharing* our understanding of the rules with fellow actor homies. The industry may decide to keep these disguised and implied. We, however, can bring them out into the open and make them crystal clear. MVP status is automatically granted the second we empower another player. They're the rules. ## TL;DR? No worries. Here are the three key takeaways: - Pain is inevitable in life and on every career path. Conversely, suffering – fighting the inevitable pain – is optional. - It helps to remember that each of us signed up *voluntarily* to play the actor's game. We can stop playing at any time. - Getting into the habit of sidestepping suffering requires repetition, but these reps offer a high ROI. As does sharing this insight with fellow actors on the path. --- ****Love what you're reading?** [****Help us keep it flowing**](https://www.dojoactors.com/#/portal/support)****.** Donations support the research, writing, and free sharing of evidence-informed tools for actor performance and well-being. Every dollar fuels our mission to make thriving a reality for actors everywhere 🔥 --- ### ‌**Citations** \[1\] [https://www.tarabrach.com/blog-working-pain-mindfulness/](https://www.tarabrach.com/blog-working-pain-mindfulness/?ref=dojoactors.com) --- ### **Cite us!** IG: @theactorsdojo APA 7: Norrish, T. (2022, November 29). *Suffering? You're not alone (and it's not the end)*. The Actor’s Dojo.